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Friday, 8 July 2011

The Rita Muchiri's of Kenya eat your hearts out

I wonder what Ms.Rita Muchiri and others of her ilk are thinking when they realise that soon their desires to be millionaires might remain just that:a desire.

If you don't know who Rita is,you are either too ignorant of social media,not Kenyan or dont even listen to King'ang'i in the morning.Let me bring you up to speed(..yawn..!).

She is the lady who caused so much ruckus recently by claiming that any 'serious marriage contender' will have to cough up a whooping Ksh 1Million!Her logic is that,being a learned 'independent' woman pursuing  her  masters’ degree in law and economy,she will have spent over Ksh 1.2 Milliion by the end of her education.
This is the much Ms.Rita would have spent from Primary all the way to University.

Rita Muchiri:The 1Million Shilling Dowry Mamacita.

So,you see,to be her ideal " tall, brown, financially stable, well-educated, and responsible" suitor you ought to be ready to part with Ksh 1 Million  plus as a 'Thank you" to her parents.

Right now im sure the Rita's of this Kenya are banging their heads against hard concrete at the mention of the the Proposed Marriage Bill.The bill has wiped the smile off of their faces because it brings a new twist to the whole paying of dowry power-play.

The proposed Marriage Bill released by the Commission for Implementation of the Constitution seeks to do away with dowry payment.So,Rita's parents and her in-laws salivating over the prospect of squeezing the last coin out of her poor suitor(s),can as well eat a humble pie.Under the law they have no right to demand a hefty dowry.So,in other words,Rita's parents:"No fat thank you's"!In your face!

Furthermore,the bill will legalize 'come we stay'unions so long as the involved parties have lived together openly  for atleast 2years in circumstances that will deem them as husband and wife.Ahem..!This part i have issues with....

Call me conservative but,dowry is symbolical.Its a small token.Note the use of the word small.Just a show of appreciation to the parents for good stewardship and moral upbringing of their daughter to be a grown @ss woman of integrity and an ideal wife for you.

In as much as come we stay unions are common practice in Kenya,to me its more of  'soft stealing'.Comparable to the way a pastor will smear some olive oil/anointing oil on you,pray for you and your family and then during his sermon ask you to buy a bottle of that oil at the church exit for Ksh 1000!

Such trips to In-laws soon will be a thing of the past

I know a lot of men who are screaming halleluia right now at the idea of not paying dowry.Much so,the hustle of having to forfeit weekend meetings with the boys at the local drinking spot as you save up for the same.Then calling up your male friends and that talkative uncle as your spokesman and having to travel all the way to "ushago"in your designer suit that was probably borrowed or bought on loan.Worse still having to remain calm under sweltering heat as you and your vatos are grilled by some old folk with no front teeth,salivating as they blurt out figures they only read about on Std 2 mathematics text books.

If i was to rewind time and press play,probably i would have joined the halleluia screaming men in jubilation.
But men worth their salt pay reasonable dowries.Thats my word!

The bill also allows for polygamy.Though once you are monogamous you can as well kiss the idea of being polygamous goodbye.However,upon agreement the polygamous marriage can be reverted to a monogamous one.Unmarried men can choose either and the man has the right to declare what kind of marriage it will be.The women folk have no say in this..(Sorry..!)

Any 'smart' man will leave his options open.He will apply for the polygamous certificate.
So,if you decide to 'buy' Rita for her 1 Milli' and a few years down the line you feel she has 'grown horns' you can just walk back in to the registrars and book to have another marriage.
And seeing you had decided to 'settle' for Rita,it means you have more than enough benjamins,so
  what will stop you from taking up # 2?

Just remember that after you pay up all that cash,there will be no room for claiming reimbursement for your dowry under the law.

This story sparked so much debate in the office,that i had to put up my 2cents' worth under company time.
Dowry payment is like a double edged sword that can cut you either way.But the way i see it and most men i believe will see it,if you rotate your arm a little bit,you can also slap with the sword and it wont cut you....!

The scribe rests his pen.

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